1 00:00:15,002 --> 00:00:19,029 Does it bother anybody else that these women live in Hooterville? 2 00:00:19,140 --> 00:00:22,268 Technically, Petticoat Junction is down the track from Hooterville. 3 00:00:22,343 --> 00:00:23,901 Okay, does it bother anybody else... 4 00:00:23,978 --> 00:00:26,412 that they live down the track from Hooterville? 5 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:29,540 It bothers me that they bathe in the town water tank. 6 00:00:30,451 --> 00:00:31,884 With the dog. 7 00:00:31,953 --> 00:00:35,252 It isn't the drinking water. It is the water for the train. 8 00:00:35,523 --> 00:00:39,789 - It's still three naked women with a dog. - I want to be the Hooterville dog. 9 00:00:41,729 --> 00:00:44,289 Yoo-hoo! Coming down. 10 00:00:44,665 --> 00:00:47,828 Now don't mind me. I'm just putting some clothes in. 11 00:00:47,902 --> 00:00:49,164 Eric, honey... 12 00:00:49,236 --> 00:00:51,864 I thought you could wear this on your birthday. It's nice. 13 00:00:51,939 --> 00:00:53,804 You look so handsome in it. 14 00:00:56,344 --> 00:00:57,436 It's your birthday? 15 00:00:57,511 --> 00:01:00,810 You never know what's going to happen on your birthday. 16 00:01:01,782 --> 00:01:05,081 Mom, do not throw a party for me. 17 00:01:05,653 --> 00:01:09,919 Listen to Mr. Popularity. Like I have time to plan you a party. 18 00:01:14,662 --> 00:01:15,686 By the way... 19 00:01:15,763 --> 00:01:19,290 your sister Laurie's coming home from college for the weekend. 20 00:01:19,367 --> 00:01:21,665 No special reason. She just is. 21 00:01:24,338 --> 00:01:27,899 You're getting a party. And best of all, it's a surprise. 22 00:01:27,975 --> 00:01:29,966 I just realized, Donna's older than you. 23 00:01:30,044 --> 00:01:32,342 - Only by a month. - Good for you, Eric. 24 00:01:32,413 --> 00:01:35,109 - Good for me, what? - In my country... 25 00:01:35,182 --> 00:01:37,776 it is good luck to fall in love with an older woman. 26 00:01:37,852 --> 00:01:40,753 - Fez? - No, they come with livestock. 27 00:01:43,157 --> 00:01:45,284 Hanging out 28 00:01:47,028 --> 00:01:49,292 Down the street 29 00:01:50,765 --> 00:01:52,960 The same old thing 30 00:01:54,368 --> 00:01:56,563 We did last week 31 00:01:57,872 --> 00:02:00,898 Not a thing to do 32 00:02:01,776 --> 00:02:04,643 But talk to you 33 00:02:05,112 --> 00:02:07,376 Whoa, yeah 34 00:02:09,483 --> 00:02:12,418 Hello, Wisconsin! 35 00:02:26,801 --> 00:02:28,769 - Morning. - Morning. 36 00:02:34,108 --> 00:02:35,473 I'll get it. 37 00:02:42,983 --> 00:02:44,382 I'll get it. 38 00:02:47,822 --> 00:02:51,121 Did I just see about seven bags of potato chips in there? 39 00:02:51,225 --> 00:02:52,886 They were on sale. 40 00:02:54,662 --> 00:02:56,357 Please, don't throw me a party. 41 00:02:56,731 --> 00:02:58,028 I'm not throwing a party. 42 00:02:58,099 --> 00:02:59,794 - Don't give him one. - I'm not. 43 00:02:59,867 --> 00:03:02,927 - He's too old for a surprise party. - I'm agreeing with you. 44 00:03:03,003 --> 00:03:05,267 - Then stop yelling. - I'm not yelling. 45 00:03:06,207 --> 00:03:09,005 Look, I know money is tight, so I don't want a big birthday. 46 00:03:09,076 --> 00:03:11,374 I'll decide when money is tight. 47 00:03:12,379 --> 00:03:14,711 Now, what kind of gift do you want? 48 00:03:14,782 --> 00:03:18,081 Don't worry about the cost. As long as it's reasonable. 49 00:03:18,619 --> 00:03:21,247 Okay. I would like a cassette player for the car. 50 00:03:22,089 --> 00:03:24,421 A cassette. Not an eight-track. 51 00:03:24,925 --> 00:03:26,517 No eight-track, okay? 52 00:03:28,162 --> 00:03:32,155 You know, I don't know why they don't just put record players in cars. 53 00:03:34,602 --> 00:03:38,060 The point is, I don't want an eight-track tape player. 54 00:03:38,205 --> 00:03:41,072 - Then you won't get one. - But, honey, he wants one. 55 00:03:41,142 --> 00:03:43,975 No, I want a tape player, just not an eight-track. 56 00:03:44,612 --> 00:03:45,840 You'll get a Delco. 57 00:03:45,913 --> 00:03:48,882 A genuine GM part for your genuine GM car. 58 00:03:50,785 --> 00:03:53,117 It doesn't have to be a Delco. It's just for music. 59 00:03:53,187 --> 00:03:55,712 See, now there's your first mistake. 60 00:03:56,257 --> 00:03:58,657 Parts have to be compatible, Eric. 61 00:04:01,529 --> 00:04:04,555 You're not burning cheap gas in that car, are you? 62 00:04:05,666 --> 00:04:06,860 No, sir. 63 00:04:09,804 --> 00:04:11,294 I'm going out. 64 00:04:12,339 --> 00:04:13,431 Good. 65 00:04:14,108 --> 00:04:18,169 I want you to run to the store for me. Get a large can of frosting... 66 00:04:18,245 --> 00:04:21,578 and 15 small bags of M&M's. Plain, not peanuts. 67 00:04:27,288 --> 00:04:28,846 They're for your sister. 68 00:04:37,798 --> 00:04:39,527 That was close. 69 00:04:51,011 --> 00:04:53,002 - So? - What? 70 00:04:53,080 --> 00:04:55,241 What are you going to get Eric for his birthday? 71 00:04:55,316 --> 00:04:56,578 I don't know. 72 00:04:56,784 --> 00:04:58,547 Nothing seems right. 73 00:04:59,053 --> 00:05:01,920 I want to give him something special. 74 00:05:05,359 --> 00:05:06,417 He kissed you! 75 00:05:07,561 --> 00:05:10,860 Get in the car. Donna, get in the car so we can talk. 76 00:05:14,802 --> 00:05:16,599 Okay, what happened? 77 00:05:16,837 --> 00:05:19,499 Jackie, I'm not gonna talk to you about this. 78 00:05:19,573 --> 00:05:21,598 Then who are you gonna talk to? 79 00:05:25,246 --> 00:05:28,613 Okay, we get home from the Rundgren Concert... 80 00:05:28,682 --> 00:05:31,583 and I'm sitting on the hood of the car, and I kissed him. 81 00:05:31,652 --> 00:05:33,381 French or American? 82 00:05:34,455 --> 00:05:36,821 I can't believe I'm talking to you about this. 83 00:05:36,891 --> 00:05:38,518 Guys, no. 84 00:05:41,362 --> 00:05:43,387 Okay, so... 85 00:05:43,797 --> 00:05:46,357 Look, I've lived next door to Eric my entire life... 86 00:05:46,433 --> 00:05:48,025 and we talk about everything together. 87 00:05:48,102 --> 00:05:50,070 We love the same music, we love the Packers. 88 00:05:50,137 --> 00:05:51,968 Then I kissed him, and everything changed. 89 00:05:52,039 --> 00:05:54,269 Now I don't know if he's my boyfriend or best friend. 90 00:05:54,341 --> 00:05:56,241 If he's my boyfriend, I'd lose my best friend. 91 00:05:56,310 --> 00:05:57,777 If I screw it up, I lose both. 92 00:05:57,845 --> 00:05:59,904 Now I have to get him this gift and I don't know... 93 00:05:59,980 --> 00:06:01,208 Donna! 94 00:06:02,950 --> 00:06:04,474 I've solved it. 95 00:06:04,919 --> 00:06:07,149 Get him a scented candle. 96 00:06:07,821 --> 00:06:09,448 A scented candle? 97 00:06:10,724 --> 00:06:12,988 It's practical and romantic. 98 00:06:13,527 --> 00:06:14,789 Yeah. 99 00:06:17,197 --> 00:06:20,030 Hey! 100 00:06:23,203 --> 00:06:26,036 I have the ball last. I win. No, you didn't win. 101 00:06:26,106 --> 00:06:28,074 Yes. I had the ball last and... 102 00:06:30,344 --> 00:06:32,039 Holy Mother. 103 00:06:35,349 --> 00:06:36,839 Hello, Laurie. 104 00:06:37,751 --> 00:06:39,912 Hello, Kelso. Hyde. 105 00:06:41,221 --> 00:06:42,654 Who is the goddess? 106 00:06:45,492 --> 00:06:47,653 The goddess is Eric's sister. 107 00:06:48,195 --> 00:06:49,219 She's not a goddess. 108 00:06:49,296 --> 00:06:52,754 She's more the earth mother whore type, which works for me. 109 00:06:56,370 --> 00:06:58,565 - Laurie. - Eric. 110 00:06:58,772 --> 00:07:01,639 Shouldn't you put some clothes on? Why? 111 00:07:01,709 --> 00:07:03,370 Aren't you a little cold? 112 00:07:04,144 --> 00:07:07,978 - No, in fact, I'm hot. - Then why don't you go upstairs? 113 00:07:09,583 --> 00:07:12,108 I am waiting for my jeans to come out of the dryer. 114 00:07:12,186 --> 00:07:15,781 And I want you to stay off my case. It'll only take me a minute. 115 00:07:16,056 --> 00:07:18,581 I don't think Kelso's gonna last that long. 116 00:07:20,027 --> 00:07:22,894 Too bad. It's not like I'm completely naked under this. 117 00:07:23,263 --> 00:07:25,356 I'm wearing underwear. See? 118 00:07:29,136 --> 00:07:31,468 If we were at the beach, you wouldn't even notice me. 119 00:07:31,538 --> 00:07:34,632 If we were at the beach, Kelso would be in the water right now. 120 00:07:39,113 --> 00:07:41,138 So, I understand you have the wagon now. 121 00:07:41,215 --> 00:07:43,683 I want to borrow it tomorrow night. I need it. 122 00:07:43,751 --> 00:07:47,346 - Okay. But I need a favor. - For you? I don't think so. 123 00:07:47,421 --> 00:07:48,649 Come on. 124 00:07:48,889 --> 00:07:51,687 Look, just tell Mom I'm too old for surprise parties. 125 00:07:51,759 --> 00:07:54,660 But you're the baby, and Mama loves her baby. 126 00:07:55,963 --> 00:07:58,193 If you do it, you can borrow the Vista Cruiser. 127 00:07:58,265 --> 00:07:59,994 - All night. - All night? 128 00:08:01,435 --> 00:08:02,493 Fine. 129 00:08:02,803 --> 00:08:05,203 Then, it's a deal, baby. 130 00:08:20,587 --> 00:08:22,487 Your sister wants me. 131 00:08:24,992 --> 00:08:27,324 I mean, you saw her coming on to me, right? 132 00:08:27,394 --> 00:08:28,725 Let him go. 133 00:08:30,764 --> 00:08:33,494 Remember? I said, "Hello, Laurie." 134 00:08:33,901 --> 00:08:35,232 And Laurie said... 135 00:08:35,736 --> 00:08:36,896 Hello, Kelso. 136 00:08:36,970 --> 00:08:40,804 I'm waiting and I want you. Baby. Take me now. 137 00:08:41,075 --> 00:08:43,737 I need it bad. I need it all night. 138 00:08:43,811 --> 00:08:45,972 And Mama loves her baby. 139 00:08:46,046 --> 00:08:47,673 I'm completely naked under this. 140 00:08:47,748 --> 00:08:49,807 And I'm hot for you, Kelso. 141 00:08:59,493 --> 00:09:00,585 What? 142 00:09:02,029 --> 00:09:03,519 You didn't see it? 143 00:09:07,134 --> 00:09:08,624 Get out of the yard! 144 00:09:12,473 --> 00:09:16,432 So, how's your friend Janice? 145 00:09:18,145 --> 00:09:19,373 Pregnant. 146 00:09:20,581 --> 00:09:24,483 She was such a nice girl. How does that happen? 147 00:09:25,452 --> 00:09:29,252 First the egg travels down the fallopian tube to the uterus... 148 00:09:29,323 --> 00:09:30,915 where it attaches to the wall. 149 00:09:30,991 --> 00:09:35,052 Eric, for God's sakes, that's no language for a woman to hear. 150 00:09:37,131 --> 00:09:39,793 It's okay, Red. I know what a fallopian tube is. 151 00:09:39,867 --> 00:09:41,459 I think Mom does, too. 152 00:09:42,769 --> 00:09:46,762 I just don't like my little boy bandying those words about. 153 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:48,603 You're still my baby. 154 00:09:50,210 --> 00:09:51,609 Thanks, Mom. 155 00:09:52,279 --> 00:09:53,405 Laurie? 156 00:09:55,382 --> 00:09:58,545 Quit staring at your sister and eat your carrots. 157 00:10:00,988 --> 00:10:04,788 Yeah, Eric wanted me to tell you that he thinks he's too old for a party. 158 00:10:04,858 --> 00:10:05,950 Keys. 159 00:10:07,928 --> 00:10:09,555 There's no party. 160 00:10:09,630 --> 00:10:11,621 Laurie, loose lips. 161 00:10:12,766 --> 00:10:14,199 Laurie, I just remembered: 162 00:10:14,268 --> 00:10:17,203 I can't loan you the Vista Cruiser on account of I hate you. 163 00:10:19,039 --> 00:10:23,533 Laurie, you're not driving the Vista Cruiser. It's old and undependable. 164 00:10:23,644 --> 00:10:27,637 It could break down and you'd be at the mercy of any maniac who came along. 165 00:10:27,948 --> 00:10:31,509 It's okay for Eric, but you're taking the Toyota. 166 00:10:34,321 --> 00:10:37,722 And here's $20. 167 00:10:39,693 --> 00:10:41,456 Will that cover gas? 168 00:10:42,896 --> 00:10:46,627 It should. Honey, give her another $10, just in case. 169 00:10:48,635 --> 00:10:51,627 You know, I could probably use some gas money. 170 00:10:52,105 --> 00:10:56,303 Yeah, and if a frog had wings, he wouldn't bump his ass when he hops. 171 00:11:02,716 --> 00:11:04,581 Coming. I'm coming. 172 00:11:07,888 --> 00:11:09,048 Donna? 173 00:11:09,389 --> 00:11:11,357 Donna, it's 3:00 a. m. Are you crazy? 174 00:11:11,425 --> 00:11:14,826 Crazy? Crazy in love with you. 175 00:11:16,430 --> 00:11:20,196 What is it about you that drives me wild with passion and desire? 176 00:11:20,867 --> 00:11:24,359 I am 17 now. 177 00:11:25,872 --> 00:11:27,703 Shut up, and sit down. 178 00:11:31,211 --> 00:11:33,577 I have to give you your birthday present. 179 00:11:33,981 --> 00:11:35,949 It can't wait any longer. 180 00:11:36,917 --> 00:11:38,544 Close your eyes. 181 00:11:43,123 --> 00:11:47,059 This is my birthday present? No, that's my nightgown. 182 00:11:47,394 --> 00:11:51,194 I'm your present. Open your eyes, birthday boy. 183 00:11:51,765 --> 00:11:53,357 Surprise! 184 00:11:56,536 --> 00:11:57,935 Birthday breakfast. 185 00:11:58,005 --> 00:12:01,532 And this is it, young man. A few gifts tonight, the end. 186 00:12:02,542 --> 00:12:05,807 And it is too late to change your mind about a party now. 187 00:12:05,879 --> 00:12:10,043 So don't think you're getting one or you will be sorely disappointed. 188 00:12:14,588 --> 00:12:16,112 Happy birthday. 189 00:12:17,491 --> 00:12:20,722 You know, the lawn's not gonna cut itself. 190 00:12:23,030 --> 00:12:25,362 Thanks, Mom, Dad. 191 00:12:25,932 --> 00:12:28,162 Hey, little brother. Nice tent. 192 00:12:42,887 --> 00:12:45,583 Look, I know what you're all doing here. 193 00:12:47,025 --> 00:12:49,050 What are you talking about, Eric? 194 00:12:50,128 --> 00:12:53,222 We're just hanging out. Like always. Except we're dressed nice. 195 00:12:53,298 --> 00:12:55,027 But that doesn't mean anything. 196 00:13:00,738 --> 00:13:05,072 Hi, kids. I need your help with something. 197 00:13:05,310 --> 00:13:07,744 Jackie, Donna, Michael, Steven... 198 00:13:08,346 --> 00:13:11,611 young man with an accent, could you give me a hand? 199 00:13:11,983 --> 00:13:13,473 Not you, Eric. 200 00:13:30,268 --> 00:13:31,895 God, I can't take it. 201 00:13:34,372 --> 00:13:35,396 But I... No. 202 00:13:35,473 --> 00:13:36,701 No, I... No. 203 00:13:41,145 --> 00:13:43,170 Eric? Eric, honey. 204 00:13:43,248 --> 00:13:45,773 Honey, could you come up here for a second? 205 00:13:45,850 --> 00:13:47,408 Shut up. He's coming. 206 00:13:49,521 --> 00:13:51,352 Surprise! 207 00:13:54,993 --> 00:13:56,051 Wow! 208 00:13:56,828 --> 00:13:58,955 I mean, yeah. 209 00:14:00,164 --> 00:14:02,291 It's an eight-track tape player. 210 00:14:03,201 --> 00:14:05,396 - I see that. - Just what you asked for. 211 00:14:11,242 --> 00:14:15,508 - Cassettes. Great. Thanks, Hyde. - You're welcome. 212 00:14:15,914 --> 00:14:18,439 Let's put them in the eight-track and play them. 213 00:14:21,986 --> 00:14:24,352 It's a hot-shave dispenser. 214 00:14:24,422 --> 00:14:27,516 He won't need that for a long time. 215 00:14:28,393 --> 00:14:32,727 - A long time. - Of course he will. He's almost like a man. 216 00:14:36,601 --> 00:14:38,330 - I got you something. - No. 217 00:14:38,403 --> 00:14:41,702 Donna, help me find my purse. Now. 218 00:14:44,943 --> 00:14:47,002 Jackie, you didn't even bring a purse. 219 00:14:48,146 --> 00:14:50,774 You can't give him your present in front of his guy friends. 220 00:14:50,848 --> 00:14:52,941 I am one of his guy friends. 221 00:14:53,751 --> 00:14:57,187 Look, Donna, I have put a lot of thought into this gift. 222 00:14:57,255 --> 00:14:59,485 Please do not wreck this for me. 223 00:14:59,557 --> 00:15:02,788 I'm sorry. I guess I was being selfish. 224 00:15:03,394 --> 00:15:04,622 It's okay. 225 00:15:09,734 --> 00:15:12,202 Okay, it's time we disappeared. 226 00:15:12,270 --> 00:15:16,206 - What? Honey, the party just started. - That's why we're going over to Bob's. 227 00:15:16,274 --> 00:15:19,209 - I wanted to give Eric a party. - And you did. 228 00:15:19,677 --> 00:15:22,202 You make a mess, you're all grounded. 229 00:15:25,617 --> 00:15:27,414 You darn kids. 230 00:15:27,952 --> 00:15:30,443 You know, what if they run out of ketchup or something. 231 00:15:30,521 --> 00:15:32,853 Let's go. Okay. We have more buns... 232 00:15:32,924 --> 00:15:36,382 and sweet pickles if you don't like the dill. 233 00:15:40,164 --> 00:15:43,065 Okay, I'd love to stay, but I'm leaving. 234 00:15:43,134 --> 00:15:45,694 Buy us some beers? We'll pay double. 235 00:15:45,770 --> 00:15:49,297 Do you really think that beer will make your little party better? 236 00:15:49,540 --> 00:15:50,802 Yes. 237 00:15:51,676 --> 00:15:54,372 I admit it would give you young people a sense of maturity... 238 00:15:54,445 --> 00:15:57,437 but it would be a false maturity, and that would be wrong. 239 00:15:57,515 --> 00:16:00,177 - So you're not going to do it? - Of course not. 240 00:16:00,284 --> 00:16:03,845 Now, I'm going off to join my legal friends at a party with a keg. 241 00:16:04,222 --> 00:16:05,314 Bye. 242 00:16:07,825 --> 00:16:10,157 So, Laurie... 243 00:16:11,496 --> 00:16:15,091 where's the party? You know, maybe we'll cruise by later. 244 00:16:17,035 --> 00:16:19,060 In your dreams, you idiot. 245 00:16:22,206 --> 00:16:24,333 Okay, you guys had to see that. 246 00:16:27,845 --> 00:16:29,870 Three fours, I need them. 247 00:16:31,716 --> 00:16:34,150 Bob is very good at Yahtzee. 248 00:16:35,286 --> 00:16:37,720 - The liquor cabinet. - It's locked. 249 00:16:37,955 --> 00:16:41,550 - What if there's an emergency? - They'll call. 250 00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:43,958 - What if they run out of chips? - They'll starve. 251 00:16:44,028 --> 00:16:46,929 I'm gonna fix myself a Tom Collins. 252 00:16:46,998 --> 00:16:48,158 Red? 253 00:16:48,232 --> 00:16:51,793 No, Kitty needs one. I am just so worried. 254 00:16:51,869 --> 00:16:55,896 - My lord. Laurie's leaving. - Honey, she's in college. 255 00:16:55,973 --> 00:16:57,873 She doesn't want to hang around with them. 256 00:16:57,942 --> 00:17:01,002 Maybe I should make a call, just in case... 257 00:17:02,613 --> 00:17:05,741 Kitty, what could happen? 258 00:17:07,185 --> 00:17:08,652 What could happen? 259 00:17:12,023 --> 00:17:14,014 Plenty could happen. 260 00:17:15,093 --> 00:17:16,651 Plenty. 261 00:17:18,563 --> 00:17:23,159 Now that the adults are gone, we can be as bad as we want. 262 00:17:24,469 --> 00:17:27,734 Who wants to give Eric a venereal disease? 263 00:17:29,574 --> 00:17:31,940 Look. Coasters. 264 00:17:32,110 --> 00:17:34,101 Forget coasters! 265 00:17:35,747 --> 00:17:37,112 Please, fellas... 266 00:17:37,181 --> 00:17:40,116 my mom put out coasters for a reason. 267 00:17:41,786 --> 00:17:46,120 I think I'm gonna put my drink directly on the furniture. 268 00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:49,023 That way, it will leave a ring. 269 00:17:50,528 --> 00:17:51,927 No! 270 00:17:52,029 --> 00:17:55,556 Why didn't I beg my mother... 271 00:17:55,633 --> 00:17:56,998 to stay? 272 00:17:57,902 --> 00:18:00,166 Quiet, you silly American. 273 00:18:00,338 --> 00:18:02,568 I am making a long distance call... 274 00:18:02,640 --> 00:18:04,540 on your parents'phone. 275 00:18:05,777 --> 00:18:07,472 But that's immoral. 276 00:18:07,845 --> 00:18:10,006 In my country of... 277 00:18:10,281 --> 00:18:13,045 Wherever it is I am from, I can never tell. 278 00:18:13,651 --> 00:18:16,415 Morals get in the way of a good dirty time. 279 00:18:16,487 --> 00:18:19,320 But first, I need to eat some chips. 280 00:18:19,957 --> 00:18:22,289 What? Out of chips? 281 00:18:23,127 --> 00:18:24,856 Now I am mad. 282 00:18:24,929 --> 00:18:26,954 I must shoot something. 283 00:18:28,199 --> 00:18:31,464 Not the littlest hobo! 284 00:18:35,873 --> 00:18:39,400 Why? 285 00:18:40,511 --> 00:18:42,240 You're over-reacting. 286 00:18:43,214 --> 00:18:46,342 Kitty, when Valerie went off to school, I felt the same way... 287 00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:49,284 but this little book of poems helped me. 288 00:18:51,122 --> 00:18:54,319 It's called, "Verses from an empty nest." 289 00:18:54,992 --> 00:18:57,483 Read her that one about the little bird that lost its way. 290 00:18:57,562 --> 00:18:58,551 Yeah. 291 00:18:59,730 --> 00:19:01,960 "The little bird that once did sing 292 00:19:02,033 --> 00:19:04,467 "is now alone with broken wing" 293 00:19:04,535 --> 00:19:05,729 God. 294 00:19:07,505 --> 00:19:09,302 Yep, that sounds nice. 295 00:19:10,141 --> 00:19:13,440 - I need a refill. - But, honey, usually you only drink one. 296 00:19:13,511 --> 00:19:15,502 Tonight I'm having two. 297 00:19:17,515 --> 00:19:20,973 - Wait on the porch, and I'll get Eric. - It's dark out there. 298 00:19:21,352 --> 00:19:24,378 And you're giving him a candle. Yeah. 299 00:19:26,390 --> 00:19:28,915 - Here, matches. - He might not want to light it. 300 00:19:28,993 --> 00:19:31,188 Don't say that. Don't even think it. 301 00:19:31,329 --> 00:19:36,028 Now, when he opens it, he'll say cool or something. 302 00:19:36,100 --> 00:19:38,762 And then you give him a look like this. 303 00:19:44,442 --> 00:19:47,343 - So, what did you get from Donna? - Nothing, yet. 304 00:19:51,549 --> 00:19:53,517 Maybe it's the big gift. 305 00:19:55,620 --> 00:19:58,111 You know, the really big gift. 306 00:20:01,626 --> 00:20:06,222 You guys know what I'm saying when I say, "the big gift," right? 307 00:20:07,098 --> 00:20:08,588 Yeah, we got it. 308 00:20:09,834 --> 00:20:11,233 And we got it. 309 00:20:12,003 --> 00:20:14,471 I'm not even from here and I got it. 310 00:20:16,941 --> 00:20:19,910 Eric. Donna's on the porch. 311 00:20:21,979 --> 00:20:24,277 He's getting the big gift! 312 00:20:28,319 --> 00:20:32,847 - A sand candle. This is very cool. - It's nothing. 313 00:20:47,238 --> 00:20:51,265 - Are you okay? - I'm fine. Yeah. 314 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:55,368 'Cause you had a look like you might be sick or something. 315 00:20:56,580 --> 00:20:59,071 I am just being completely stupid. 316 00:20:59,684 --> 00:21:01,117 That's my job. 317 00:21:02,787 --> 00:21:07,224 - I was worried about the gift. - Why? This is a very cool gift. 318 00:21:08,359 --> 00:21:11,385 - I'd light it if I had matches. - Here. 319 00:21:14,565 --> 00:21:16,590 You thought of everything. 320 00:21:16,968 --> 00:21:19,528 Happy birthday. 321 00:21:33,384 --> 00:21:36,114 Look at this. 322 00:21:37,788 --> 00:21:40,052 We never thought to put a candle out here. 323 00:21:40,124 --> 00:21:42,752 It is just so romantic. 324 00:21:42,860 --> 00:21:47,092 Let's keep moving. There's nothing to see out here. 325 00:21:47,164 --> 00:21:49,064 Thanks, Dad. 326 00:21:49,367 --> 00:21:52,268 We have candles in the bedroom, don't we? 327 00:22:01,212 --> 00:22:03,146 This is it. He's going for it. 328 00:22:04,382 --> 00:22:08,079 - It's his birthday, she should kiss him first. - She did last time. 329 00:22:08,152 --> 00:22:12,088 - What? - Nothing. Shut up and watch. 330 00:22:12,623 --> 00:22:14,250 Come on, Forman, go for it. 331 00:22:14,325 --> 00:22:16,691 The door's open, we can hear you. 332 00:22:19,964 --> 00:22:21,397 We can see you. 333 00:22:23,601 --> 00:22:27,059 Is he kissing her? None of us can see them, Fez. 334 00:22:27,805 --> 00:22:30,103 Eric, are you kissing her?